PSA: September is...

bdbrown66

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May 16, 2016
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Hey, folks. I know we are all anxious and ready to get the fall season started, with all of the good things that come with it. But please allow me a few minutes of your time for something very serious first.

If you don't already know, September is National Suicide Prevention Month. Certainly not a fun and exciting topic to discuss, but it's of vital importance and a cause that is very near and dear to my heart.

Almost 6 years ago, on November 27th, 2020 my wife and I lost our youngest son, Cary, to suicide. He was 23, extremely well-liked, HS class valedictorian, and a senior Honors Electrical Engineering student at the University of Kentucky. We were totally blindsided by this event, and the effect on our family can only be described as utter devastation. Fortunately, we had a wonderful support system around us in the form of family, friends, church, and even total strangers that offered their support. With a lot of tears, prayers, love, and sleepless nights, we finally managed to get back on our feet again. But our lives have been forever changed.

After spending 3 years in a support group for suicide survivors in Louisville, we founded a sister group a few counties further south, which is better able to serve the folks in that area. Heartland Survivors of Suicide (https://facebook.com/KYHeartlandSoS/) has been in existence for about 2.5 years now. If you know someone in the central Kentucky area who needs our help, please send them our way.

If you or anyone you know is struggling with suicidal thoughts...please, please, please...get the help you need. Don't feel that you are in this fight all alone, that you don't matter, and that things would be better if you weren't here. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem, and it doesn't remove the pain. It just multiplies it and transfers it to all of the people closest to you.

If you have lost a friend or loved one to suicide, I can't stress enough how important a support group that understands this loss can be to your recovery...even many years after the fact. There is nothing like being able to sit and talk to a group of people who all understand the pain and emotions you are dealing with, because they have been down that road themselves. And there is nothing that can give you hope of recovery better than listening to the words of someone who is 5, 10, 20 years or more down that road.

Suicide is somewhat of an abstract, far-away concept until you stop and take a look around. Given the situation as it is today, it's more likely to be a matter of "when," not "if," it will hit close to home for any of us. These are real tragedies, affecting real people and real families, not just something that's far away from your reality. I speak from experience: Suicide took something priceless from me that I can never replace. I'm sharing this video of my son if you would like to see what this tragedy has cost me and my family, and why I'm so passionate about this topic now. I made it for his memorial service about 6 months after he passed, and it was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do in my entire life.

If you would like to reach out to talk or for any discussion or help, please feel free to do so. I'm glad to help wherever I can, and if nothing else I can try to point you in the direction of someone who is better suited than I for your situation. I can be reached via email at heartlandsos@outlook.com.

A good "one-stop-shop" for information about suicide awareness, prevention, and related issues can be found at https://www.speakingofsuicide.com/resources/. A lot of good information there.

Again, please get the help you need if you are struggling. Keep an eye on your friends and loved ones if they need help. Feel free to contact me if you want to talk. Every life saved is a tragedy averted.

God bless,
Brian Brown
"bdbrown66"

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You are so right Brian, suicide is a permanent decision to a temporary problem. We went through this one year ago last week with our son in law. The impact on our daughter and 2 grandsons has been devastating.
I’m sorry to hear about your son. Prayers for you and your family.

JD338
 
You are so right Brian, suicide is a permanent decision to a temporary problem. We went through this one year ago last week with our son in law. The impact on our daughter and 2 grandsons has been devastating.
I’m sorry to hear about your son. Prayers for you and your family.

JD338
JD, is your daughter and family in a support group for suicide survivors? If not, I might be able to help find one in her area.
 
I couldn’t begin to count how many suicides I responded to over my time on the job. Wasn’t one a week but more than a couple a month. Most cases people knew something was up with the victim. Really sad deal for sure. I applaud those who can talk about their experience to help others recognize and hopefully prevent these tragedies.
 
My heart goes out to you and others who have had to go through this experience. I greatly commend you for putting your pain and suffering into helping others. Knowing what others are dealing with makes the best support pardners. At age eight my uncle took his life and twenty years later so did his son. My mom didn't want to talk about her brother and after my cousin's death it took my aunt, uncle's oldest sister to tell me all about his issues and help me deal with both their deaths. I wish someone would have pointed me in the direction you are doing for others. God bless you sir. Dan.
 
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